 | Trying to be a first-rate reporter on the average American newspaper is like trying to play Bach's 'St. Matthew's Passion' on a ukelele.
- Bagdikian's Observation
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| "Trying to determine what is going on in the world by reading newspapers is like trying to tell the time by watching the second hand of a clock."
- Ben Hecht
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| "Literature is the art of writing something that will be read twice; journalism what will be read once."
- Cyril Connolly
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| "USA Today has come out with a new survey - apparently, three out of every four people make up 75% of the population."
- David Letterman
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| "Editor: a person employed by a newspaper, whose business it is to separate the wheat from the chaff, and to see that the chaff is printed."
- Elbert Hubbard
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| "Rock journalism is people who can't write interviewing people who can't talk for people who can't read."
- Frank Zappa
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| "Journalism largely consists of saying 'Lord Jones is Dead' to people who never knew that Lord Jones was alive."
- G. K. Chesterton
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| "Half of the American people have never read a newspaper. Half never voted for President. One hopes it is the same half."
- Gore Vidal
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| "A newspaper consists of just the same number of words, whether there be any news in it or not."
- Henry Fielding
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| "It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper."
- Jerry Seinfeld
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